Chaotic Peacefulness

img_9056img_9067As I sit here in one of my absolute favorite places in the world surrounded by 5 dogs and two kids under the age of 3, I’m enveloped in the most wonderful type of chaotic peacefulness I can imagine. The dogs are loud…the kids are louder, but these moments are fleeting and I’m trying to soak them up despite the fact that I cannot hear myself think.

We’re currently enjoying a few days at my dad’s cousin’s beach house. The same house Paul and I came to for our honeymoon where our hopes for our future were young and naive. The same house where we’ve enjoyed countless vacations with family and friends.  The same house where two years ago exactly…on this very date when we were going through absolute hell.  I wrote this post C’est la vie that day.  And then I woke up to a gorgeous morning the next day, processed everything and wrote this post. A new dawn, a new day.

Little did we know Paul and I would actually end up going through embryo adoption, two more frozen embryo transfers for me and two more for our surrogate all within a two year time span.

And, it’s this particular space, with the a puzzle table in the ships watch, a hot tub with the perfect vantage point to catch beautiful sunsets and my memories here that leave me feeling so deeply grounded. The people who have surrounded us here help with that, too. We leave here today and I’m already counting down the days until we’re back again.

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